He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I met the friendliest cop last night
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
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