Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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