TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize