mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
