If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
