I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
When are your genitals available?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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