I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
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