Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
