Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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