At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
My pussy is not your playground.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
