Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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