ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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