white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I just had sex on a roof
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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