so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
