how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize