Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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