the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
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Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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