i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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