WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.