yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.