Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Most never. Some around 65.

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  (314): So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title? (816): Most never. Some around 65. http://tfl.nu/dvz5
  Replies (22) Good night (2387) Bad night (817)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.

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  (314): so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for. http://tfl.nu/ue3g
  Replies (16) Good night (4246) Bad night (1048)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.

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  (920): You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now. http://tfl.nu/yhp5
  Replies (26) Good night (1854) Bad night (7400)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.

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  (401): it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher. http://tfl.nu/14gf
  Replies (16) Good night (5431) Bad night (1396)
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  (516): View more from New York

  The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.

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  (516): The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone. http://tfl.nu/jz14
  Replies (19) Good night (3844) Bad night (1656)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...

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  (205): he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off... http://tfl.nu/kran
  Replies (6) Good night (3598) Bad night (889)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.

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  (206): Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this. http://tfl.nu/t9dh
  Replies (4) Good night (2586) Bad night (1149)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?

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  (617): did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant? http://tfl.nu/svwz
  Replies (8) Good night (2084) Bad night (1090)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.

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  (630): It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales. http://tfl.nu/sbow
  Replies (4) Good night (3786) Bad night (972)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.

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  (913): If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out. http://tfl.nu/0a1m
  Replies (15) Good night (3336) Bad night (990)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.

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  (614): The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN. http://tfl.nu/jkdc
  Replies (15) Good night (1719) Bad night (692)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.

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  (480): All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair. http://tfl.nu/6kun
  Replies (7) Good night (557) Bad night (1120)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..

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  (574): I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today.. http://tfl.nu/121n
  Replies (20) Good night (1085) Bad night (949)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.

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  (713): The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time. http://tfl.nu/2jw5
  Replies (3) Good night (734) Bad night (417)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.

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  (303): I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked. http://tfl.nu/ersw
  Replies (1) Good night (669) Bad night (337)

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