Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Did you go home with that guy without me?

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car

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  (919): Did you go home with that guy without me? (479): Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car http://tfl.nu/ua1d
  Replies (8) Good night (1255) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!

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  (917): I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time! http://tfl.nu/fe3b
  Replies (18) Good night (3119) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app

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  (586): Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app http://tfl.nu/uu0s
  Replies (78) Good night (6186) Bad night (2356)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".

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  (617): I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues". http://tfl.nu/ykd9
  Replies (13) Good night (3080) Bad night (1950)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.

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  (601): Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back. http://tfl.nu/ihr9
  Replies (2) Good night (2256) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?

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  (850): When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember? http://tfl.nu/i061
  Replies (6) Good night (2850) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me

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  (551): Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me http://tfl.nu/723s
  Replies (9) Good night (986) Bad night (1796)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy

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  (571): i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy http://tfl.nu/ffaz
  Replies (13) Good night (940) Bad night (1684)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."

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  (617): Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide." http://tfl.nu/7grl
  Replies (31) Good night (2794) Bad night (897)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?

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  (509): Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right? http://tfl.nu/bnll
  Replies (16) Good night (1831) Bad night (780)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??

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  (785): Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail?? http://tfl.nu/azi4
  Replies (4) Good night (1461) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.

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  (314): No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was. http://tfl.nu/6619
  Replies (2) Good night (1499) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I had to rip your toilet paper for you...

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  (914): I had to rip your toilet paper for you... http://tfl.nu/xdup
  Replies (3) Good night (612) Bad night (860)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.

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  (601): Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening. http://tfl.nu/53fl
  Replies (7) Good night (804) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.

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  (512): I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult. http://tfl.nu/45g5
  Replies (2) Good night (191) Bad night (345)

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