We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
