And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
