i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
