For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
