sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea