Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize