are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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