all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
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