my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
