roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.