Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
