Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
why is half of my head shaved?
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