Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
