whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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