her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
