I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
