I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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