hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
