He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Randomize
