Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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