You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
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Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
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I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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