the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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