I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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