thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
