Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize