ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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