she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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