just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Sorry my hands just texted you
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
