can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
