Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
i've created a new STD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize