The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
