Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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