nut hugger
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
