i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
