the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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